It's Time to Go Home

"It's time to come together as a nation," we've all heard it a lot this week. I disagree. It doesn't work that way. I think it's actually time for a little separation. The torrent of visceral emotions, like the voter turnout, are running at a record-breaking high, even for us. Anger elicits anger. The notion that just a bit more anger will finally breed love is a non-starter. Fanning the flames of our ideological differences, at THIS juncture only serves to deepen the wedge between us as people.

Growing up, the highlight of summer camp for me was "color war" (the irony of that was not lost on me today). Right before the winning team was announced we would chant "whether you lose or win, the judges go home," over and over again. At the time of this writing, a winner in the Presidential race has yet to be declared. But it's Erev Shabbat, and everyone, with the exception of the seemingly indefatigable duo of John King and Wolf Blitzer, is fatigued. Folks, it's time for us to go home even if the judges are still hard at work. And not together. Alone. In disengaging from one another at this point, we are merely signaling our need to disengage from this protracted and unhealthy cycle of chronic conflict.

Rabbi Jonathan Sacks points out the following. The name Abraham, whom we are reading about this week, means "mighty father" and yet he seems to be perpetually acting in ways that would question that "fatherhood" - whether in walking out on his own father, banishing his son Yishmael, or most notoriously, acceding to the demand to sacrifice Isaac in the Akeda! In truth however, seen from a different angle, (a very different one) a pattern emerges. They all point to painful instances of "letting go" in order to establish the necessary distance for healthy individuation to chart its natural path. A little bit of separation goes a long way toward nurturing healthy separateness itself. Only then, like in the story of Abraham, (later in life) do they all regroup and find one another again on different and better terms.

We are a nation divided. True. But is that a tragedy? Isn't that in fact the whole point of this country in the first place? A place to go where differing world views are celebrated? We need to take a collective national deep breath. Go home. (maybe take a cold shower.) Decompress. Declare a 24-hour ban on Twitter. Better yet, ask a trusted loved one to please hide your cell phone. Let go. Keep breathing. Don't worry, your opinion isn't going anywhere. We can't hope to find ways to come together collectively, while we are angry and falling apart individually.

This week's Shabbat came right on time. In the Kiddush (sanctification blessing on wine) we would do well to include a meditation on this lovely and relevant quote by the Irish poet John O'Donohue: "Our greatest challenge lies in learning to bless the spaces between us."